Today I will be talking about counterfactual to my blog post 5 scene.I'll be talking about what if? What if this happens? What if this changed? I also read and reflected on certain articles that happen to help me out please check them out below. Also please check out my narrative page
I screamed into the empty streets around me begging for the memories to stop. My hands shaking uncontrollably as i slap my face making new cuts across my face trying to rid the painful thoughts away from choking me. I fall to my knees sobbing and trying to breathe. My tears falling to the ground as I sob. I shake my head in panic. “I want it all to end please” I chant as if it's a mantra. My phone suddenly rings as I slowly pull it out of my pocket. It was my baby sister calling. “Hello” I say gently trying to keep my voice as calm and stable as I could. Out of everyone around me I never want my baby sister to see how much I’m actually suffering.”Hey Be, what time will you be home? Moms leaving soon” she says in a pout. I could just imagine the way she was pouting. “I’m not exactly sure. Where's everyone else?” I couldn't go home this way and let her see me. “Noone else is here and mommys taking mom mom to the store, they said it's too late for me to go.” she says. I breathed a heavy sigh looking up at the clear dark sky. “Okay, i'll see you soon” I hang up soon after she says bye dropping the glass in my other hand. My moment of whatever was happening before the call would have to wait. I have to now get home to her and find a way to clean myself up. I quickly walk back to the house opting to sneak in through the back and make a run to the bathrooms to rush into the shower. I quietly opened the door looking around making sure the coast was clear. I tiptoe around the corner peeking into the living room seeing my mom on the phone and my sister playing with her tablet. I quietly make my way up the steps until I'm finally at the top yelling down “I’m home. I'm just gonna shower really quickly” most likely startling my mom since she didn't hear me come in. I run into the bathroom locking the door behind me. I sit on the ground for a bit thinking “I’ll have to wait another day, today i’ll take care of my sister.”
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Welcome back to my blog post. Today we talked about creating a emotional scene with dialogue and symbolism. This week i will talk about a scene when i ended up in the hospital and had a brief talk with my mother. Some of the posts i read to help me out and understand how to write this scene will be linked below.
I screamed into the empty streets around me begging for the memories to stop. My hands shaking uncontrollably as i slap my face making new cuts across my face trying to rid the painful thoughts away from choking me. I fall to my knees sobbing and trying to breathe. My tears falling to the ground as I sob. I shake my head in panic. “I want it all to end please” I chant as if it's a mantra. I feel around my pockets in search of something, anything. I pull out a some pills. Swallowing may of them dry as I gasp for air laying on to the dirty ground on my back. I lay there for a while time flying by without my knowledge. Into my own little reality. Where happiness was. Where I could escape. I finally started to come to this time not exactly where I started at. This time I was in a hospital. The smell of anesthetic was high in the air. The sounds of a heart monitor beeping around me. “Damn” I thought. I was caught as I looked over to see my mother asleep in the uncomfortable chair across from me. “I would have been better off dead then to have her see me like this” I thought as I looked around the room. I made no sounds just listening to the breathing of her breath as a doctor came walking in later on. “You’re finally awake” He says smiling to me. I look at him blankly what the hell was he so happy and chirpy for? My mother wakes up at the sound of his voice and sees me awake. She has a look of disappointment across her face as I look away from her. I already know how much of a shit person I am. I don't need to see it in her eyes either. The doctor starts to ask me what happened as I continue to stare blankly at him not answering. “So you're just gonna sit here and not answer? You were found passed out drugged up on the ground” My mother yells at me. “Do you think that's okay? You could be dead!” She says on the verge of tears. I could do nothing but look down as I feel my own tears well up “I'm sorry” I whisper out. “Do you want to talk to anyone?” the doctor suggests. I shake my head no. “I'm fine” I say as my mom looks at me astonished. “No? You don't think you need some help? This isn't okay, you need to talk to someone.” I turn to my side looking away from them both “I don't need help '' I whisper out. “Please just leave” I say quietly. My mother grabs a jacket angrily walking out without another word. Hello and thanks for coming back. For today's blog I had to read three articles to help me set the scene for my blog. We discussed the writing process. My scene is set in a dream like reality since sleeping is one of my favorite hobbies. Checkout the articles for yourself below.
Teaching Writing as a Process Not Product (Don Murray) Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life (Anne Lamott) Against Vanity: In Praise of Revision (Mary Karr) Finally! It was my favorite part of the day. Bedtime! I layed in bed with a lot on my mind. “What will I write for my assignment in class?” I thought to myself “I'll just sleep on it and hopefully something will come to me as i sleep” As I drifted off into the realm of dreams a distinct red table appeared in the middle of an all white room. Three figures sat there chatting away. I walked over as one offered me tea. As I looked around I noticed who they were. Don Murray, Mary Karr, and Anne Lamott. I shook with excitement. “Omg i can’t believe it's you guys, or like a dream version of you.” I rambled on. “We only appeared cause you seemed to have a lot on your mind before you fell asleep” Mary replied. “Ahh” I said “that's right I have an assignment due soon and I have a question if you don't mind me asking.” Don nodded and gestured for me to ask my question I took a pause before I said “Well i'm not the best at writing so I was wondering what's the process to writing?” “The writing process itself can be divided into three stages: prewriting, writing, and rewriting” Don replied casually. “The amount of time a writer spends in each stage depends on his personality, his work habits, his maturity as a craftsman, and the challenge of what he is trying to say.” Mary nodded in agreement “I find generative me harder to get going. But through sheer hardheadedness, even I can grant myself permission to run buck-wild down the page with sentences dumb as stumps and few glimpses of anything pretty.” I nodded kind of understanding what they were trying to say. Anne turned to me and smiled “remember this.” she said “Plug your nose and jump in, it doesn't have to be perfect the first time you write something down, pour your heart out then go back and edit. I promise once you get started you'll never want to stop. I smiled in understandment finally getting it. I chugged the rest of my tea down as I stood up. I looked around smiling and thanking them for all of their help. I stopped for a second “One more question” I asked. “Sure what is it? Mary replied “can we have cake next time were here?” I said they all giggled as I faded back into reality. For my blog today I read A Fable for the Living (Kevin Brockmeier) for my English Comp 100 class. It's inspired me to write my own letter to myself and hope everyone takes some time to speak to themselves and hopes for the future.
Dear Flower, "Do you know what it feels like? Shall I describe it for you? It feels like I’m strapped to a chair and there's an open door in front of me--that's how it feels” I sometimes feel stuck, unmotivated and scared of the future. I sometimes feel uncertain. I know what it is I want to accomplish, but then I think “you're not good enough, smart enough, you'll never make it.” I'm sorry I've sat in my pity for so long. Blaming myself for feeling how I do, But things changed right? You became an amazing music producer and songwriter. Inspiring people in your music and touching someone's soul to feel how you felt. To comfort in those times of need. You finally graduated college. After years of putting it off you did it and boy it felt amazing right? You finally moved your family out of the slums of Chester. Man oh Man it feels great. I'm so proud of you flower. After everything you've finally got up and put action behind your words. I'm so excited to meet you one day. I hope when you receive my letter you cry like the big baby you are. So here's the start of how I will meet you.
-Love Rose Today's blog post I answer some questions relating to some articles i have read. They were very informing and im happy to share what ive learned with you all. If you would like to read the articles yourself they are linked below.
1) Why are we creating a website for our english composition I class? To grow as a writer and build a portfolio to have forever. 2) How do Ball and charlton define multimodal writing? They describe it as multiple + mode.Five modes through which meaning is made: Linguistic, Aural, Visual, Gestural, and Spatial. Any combination of modes makes a multimodal text, and all texts—every piece of communication that a human composes—use more than one mode. Thus, all writing is multimodal. 3) Do you agree with ball and charlton when the claim all writing is multimodal? Yes i do agree with them. 4) As a website author who will create your own web page content in this course, how would you rank the importance of the five modes on a scale of 1-5? Please provide a brief rationale to support each mode ranking. Aural, visual, gestural, spatial, linguistics. I picked this order because when im telling a story i want you to see it. Through my way of speaking it to you. Through my details. This my way of telling a story. 5) What does the C.R.A.P. acronym stand for? C. is for Contrast. R. is for Repetition. A. is for Alignment. P. is for Proximity. 6) As a website author who will create your own web page content in this course, how would you rank the importance of the four C.R.A.P. principles of design on a scale of 1-5? Please provide a brief rationale to support each design principle ranking. For me the order of c.r.a.p would be the order i choose. When i first get on the website the c is what catches my attention. I appreciate the r and having repetition throughout the entirety. A and P are pretty much on the same level for me making things easier for me to understand. 7) What are the seven sample criteria Borton and Huot suggest writers use to assess a multimodal composition? Purpose, audience, tone, organized, transitions, synthesizes, and detailed. 8) Do the the Borton-and-Huot criteria seem similar or different from the criteria we would use to assess a traditional print essay? Why or why not? It seems similar. Growing up most of my teachers looked for these things. Hello and welcome to my blog for English 100. My first blog will be The Proust Questionnaire written by Marcel Proust. Many of my answers really made me think and learn things about myself I may have forgotten and it also brings out a bit of my humor. Overall I had a fun time answering and you should also check it out for yourself. With the link below.
The Proust Questionnaire __1.__What is your idea of perfect happiness? Once i figure it out myself I’ll get back to you. __2.__What is your greatest fear? Death. Not just my own death. Sometimes i think since i have siblings one of us will have to experience losing the other and that scares me. __3.__What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? Being insecure. I let that get in the way sometimes from doing what I truly love. __4.__What is the trait you most deplore in others? Someone with a lack of compassion for others. __5.__Which living person do you most admire? Me! I admire my passion and pushing ahead even in troubling times. __6.__What is your greatest extravagance? Makeup and food would definitely rank high on my scale of extravagance, but what can I say? I love a full face of makeup as I eat. I would also add music equipment on that list as well. __7.__What is your current state of mind? If you could throw a bunch of mush and random things into a bowl and shake it around, that would be my mind. Just full of crazy and sometimes unnecessary thoughts. __8.__What do you consider the most overrated virtue? I'm not sure. __9.__On what occasion do you lie? I try to keep myself from lying but i can't help it when i need a day off work. __10.__What do you most dislike about your appearance? I dislike that my face is so pretty. It's so hard living this gorgeous __11.__Which living person do you most despise? I don’t believe i have anyone specific but i would say people in general who sex traffic others and kill animals just for fun. __12.__What is the quality you most like in a man? Passion. I like when a man is passionate in the things he does or puts passion in the person he likes. __13.__What is the quality you most like in a woman? Being headstrong in the things she believes in. __14.__Which words or phrases do you most overuse? I've recently have been using the word immaculate any chance I can get. __15.__What or who is the greatest love of your life? God and my dog are the greatest love of my life. __16.__When and where were you happiest? Laying in my bed eating a bread bowl with pasta. __17.__Which talent would you most like to have? To draw. I love to go view art in my free time. The best piece I have personally drew myself that i would say was good was my stick figure and even that had a slight disfiguration. __18.__If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? It Would to get more tattoos than I have right now. __19.__What do you consider your greatest achievement? My greatest achievement was to sleep for 20+ hours and I'm not ashamed to tell the world that. __20.__If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? A volcano. I would like to be hot at least once in my life. __21.__Where would you most like to live? I would love to live in Thailand. I went to visit in April of 2019 and I loved everything about it. The culture, the people, the food and more. __22.__What is your most treasured possession? My bratz dolls. I have originals from when I was small that i never opened and i know it'll be worth money one day. __23.__What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? For me the lowest part of misery is having no self love or self worth. When you don't have those things in your life you tend to sometimes just let anyone or anything come into your life. Sometimes even when its toxic. It breaks you down more bringing in self hatred for you and those around you. __24.__What is your favorite occupation? I loved working at a bakery. The atmosphere was so relaxing. The smell of freshly baked sweets that tickled my nose. The background music that would lull me into my own fantasy. Those are just some of the things I miss. __25.__What is your most marked characteristic? Im not sure. __26.__What do you most value in your friends? I value understanding the most. It's so important to have understanding friends around in times you really need people by your side to hear you out and show some compassion. __27.__Who are your favorite writers? I currently really like Lauren Kate. __28.__Who is your hero of fiction? Naruto! We love a man from the leaf village who holds on to his ninja way. __29.__Which historical figure do you most identify with? Sorry to say but none. I guess I'm just too unique. __30.__Who are your heroes in real life? The person who invented pizza. Thanks bro. __31.__What are your favorite names? Romeo and Chu. (my dog and cat name) __32.__What is it that you most dislike? When people talk to me on the bus. The bus ride is my time to relax from all human interaction. __33.__What is your greatest regret? Giving up dancing. I lost my passion and blamed those around me. __34.__How would you like to die? To die laughing. __35.__What is your motto? “Things happen” |
Juanita RoseI will use this blog to share my thoughts through writing whether it's poetic or through humor. Archives
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